Surviving a day reserved for ice cream

What do you do when you are a one woman (or man) army, stranded on an island where the entire population waits for the occasion to get together to eat, eat, eat, and then top it off with at least 7 homemade ice creams?

Simple. You bring your own food. You make a great paleo-friendly dessert to share. In this case: chocolate almond butter (w/ coconut) cups. 100% chocolate with no added sugar. Yum! Sure, it stings when a few people ask you what it is sitting there on the "dessert" table and then squint in dissapproval. Or worse, when you overhear someone saying "those are nasty". But, hey. You, and by you I mean "I", tried.

I think the most difficult part about trying to stay the course is all the questions. And for all the questions I get I have one overarching question back: "Why do you want to know?"

I can only assume that my way of life is somehow threatening and that by asking questions it tears down the mystery that make it so threatening. As if eating only vegetables, fruit, nuts, seeds and meat is so unusual. It is fascinating how unusual it can seem to others. Or that I can easily turn away a coffee cake, or a piece of candy, or chips, or beer after beer after beer. That I stop and ask myself the following:

1. "Do I want this in my body?"
2. "Will having this enhance the experience I am already having?"
3. "Is this my only chance to try this and if so, will I regret NOT trying it?"
4. "What am I missing if I have it and what am I missing if I do NOT have it?"
5. "Will I regret having this?"

These questions help guide nearly all the food choices I make. I am guessing I am the exception and not  the rule on this one.

Also, it has occurred to me that by somehow abstaining from eating all the "other" foods I am somehow silently lecturing or condemning others. This is not at all the case. Yes. I worry about others who continually make decisions to eat or drink poor choice foods. But my choices are not a reflection that I think your choices are bad. These reactions only make me wonder if others are feeling defensive and thus not 100% comfortable with their own choices. If that is the case, lets talk about it. Instead of skirting the issue by focusing on criticizing or scrutinizing my choices, lets talk about why it is so important for you to do so.

Having said all that, lets get back to the first point. You help make the ice cream. You talk about how to make it. You even help clean it all up. You try one teaspoon of each of the flavors, you talk to the other guests about what you taste in each one and you pick your favorites, just like everyone else.

                                That. Is. How. You. Survive.

Making Pistachio Ice Cream on the farm 07/06/2013

Hypocrisy at it's finest!

So, as I was writing my last post about sticking to my guns in the face of fitness and nutritional values polar opposite of mine, I was sipping, or rather, guzzling, an energy drink. One that I have had several times before. Because I had had them several times before I had inadvertently, mindlessly really, put it into the "ok to consume" pile. Just prior to taking the last guzzle I happened to look at the label and realized, to my HORROR, that GLUCOSE was the main ingredient.

I, the person trying to cut sugar from my diet (more on that later) was drinking pure sugar. I won't even touch on the chemicals.

I will not go into the details of the shame and embarrassment I experienced, but I WILL point out the silver-lining. My boyfriend, bless his amazing heart, mentioned that he KNEW it was one of the beverages with sugar in it but did not want to mention it to me out of fear that he would offend me or sound condescending. This led to a discussion about how we are all in this together, as in, I NEED his support, and of course I want him to call me out on my choices if it appears to be in opposition to the way of life I am aiming for.

So, every mistake, however stupid and ridiculous, can lead to a postive. In this case: my boyfriend and I strengthened our communication.

How to Maintain Your Motivation, Vigor and Fitness/Nutritional Values in the Face of the Polar Opposite?

This is the question that I again face as I visit my partners amazing family in the midwest. A family of incredibly warm and loving people, they of course embody the central midwestern values: they like to feed you to make you feel loved and happy.

So, in a house full of sweets, chips, beer, candy and everything else that I would slash of my list of "to-eats" in a second, how do you stay the course?

You just do.

But how do you do it graciously without tarnishing the relationships you are trying to build? As everyone else sits around the breakfast table eating coffeecake and other high-carb food, how do you not hurt the hosts feelings? My approach is to engage in an on-going conversation with the host, and others, about nutrition ideas, recipes, and fitness goals in a way that is non-threatening and inviting. I am not trying to convert anyone, merely for them to understand me so that I am not "that girl who makes it difficult for us to please".

In fact, that is another hard thing to swallow. There is the thought that I am not happy since I do not eat the same foods. I do not expect anyone to be able to anticipate my food needs 100%. Not even 20%. All I expect is for people to be open and say "join us at the table with whatever it is you would like to eat". I am happy to just be with them. I can figure out my own food.

It is my choice to live this way. To prioritize my health and well-being in this way. It is not meant to inconvenience anyone. Show me the grocery store door and I will figure it all out.

Welcome to my new endeavor

My wellness journey likely started well before my separation and subsequent divorce, but certainly this period of time allowed for serious reflection and mindbody overhaul. I did not like the person I was. I did not like the way I looked, or felt. I felt trapped. So I did something about it.

First I merely walked. A lot. For hours I would take to the neighborhood streets, walking. Briskly. Slowly. Then, even more briskly. It helped me to think. To process. To regain confidence. I would think to myself "Damn it. I am SO much more than he thinks I am" and my pace would increase. My body and mind worked together to help me pick up the pieces. And, I moved on.

Not only did I move on to a new partner, a new career and a new locale, I moved on to a new way of living and a new body. I threw myself into fitness 150%, sometimes at the expense of other things, like relationships, studying, happy hours. But it all felt, and still does feel, more than worth it. I needed to regain that part of myself that I felt I lost, or maybe never had. I needed "control".

So, this space is here for me to 1. Write about my journey to help me look back, take stock and assess my efforts to help me continue to strive forward, 2. to connect with others on a similar path, and 3. have a creative outlet again.

My challenge now is to learn all that I can about fitness, nutrition and wellness so that I can add Certified Personal Trainer to my list of credentials. You can help me. Like the rest of life, this is a learning experience and we are in it together.

Let's be strong, pick ourselves up and move on...